Monday, March 2, 2009

'RATS THE BIGGEST THREAT TO MANKIND', BY SPOKESCAT FROM CHICAGO

CATS vs DOGS.[ Dedicated to my daughter Aishwarya,nephew Sagar,neices Lakshmi,Gitika,Gayatri,Dhanya & lavanya]



Dogs are the best friend one can have, no matter how you treat them; they will still be loyal as ever to you. Which ever journey you may choose the best companion one can have is certainly a dog. He can smell trouble kilometers away, and they normally find back way home without much effort or ado. A barking dog may not be as powerful as a tiger or a lion is but, they still can match them, when it comes to sheer mental power and guts, if properly trained as a hunter or a protector for children or even adults.



Cats on the other side belongs to an entirely different species called the cat family, lion being the leader followed by tigers, panthers, leopards etc. their built in power is like a spring coiled, also gutsy when the going gets tougher. I have seen few days old kitten attacking a fully grown dog when chased and was trying to attack the dogs’ eyes, and surprisingly the dog retreated and went the other way avoiding a direct confrontation. When the cats are grown up, they are rarely caught by a dog, due to their agility and the spring like jumps.


We can observe cats moving around freely, while the dogs normally are caged or chained. Though dogs bark at the cats ferociously, they on the other side treat dogs with contempt and can be seen doing gimmicks like, lazy wag of the tail or a lick on his own weathered feather, while yawning and eying the dog as if to challenge ‘CATCH ME IF YOU CAN’ from the top of a wall or the roof of a building or even on top of a tree. They also walk in front of dogs as if to irritate them more by going around the place normally under the area of surveillance of dogs in their respective homes. As a matter of international rule cats are never ever tied or can ever be seen chained, they are normally very independent minded and lives the nights and gets small naps during day time, but for the time when a dog starts barking or a bird gets on with their melody from the trees, these are the most irritating sounds, for cats taking a nap during day time. Rats are their eternal enemy, and the forefathers of cats vowed to see that rats are extinct one day so that they can start to sleep during nights without a thought in the world. Unfortunately the rats too have increased their population despite the cat warriors on duty 24/7 throughout
The year


If you think cats and dogs don’t have thoughts then you are terribly mistaken, for their thoughts surrounds the men of the house who have become stingy and is not seen buying fish or non vegetarian stuff more frequently ,now the times have come when they get their delicious fish smell only once or twice during a month. The Leaders have strongly made their protest known and have even given notice to all those human beings who are ignoring the cats’ rights.

The agenda during the last cats meeting held in Chicago was as follows:-

Make fish a compulsory dish for daily intake.

Make comfortable and warm beds for cats inside the house.

Make cats accompany guys around instead of chained dogs ‘but no chains or belts allowed’.
Friendships forged during adolescent with dogs are at the sole discretions of the cat, under no circumstances it should be construed, as a matter of right of the dog.
Leave the dogs away and out side the purview of cats’ areas and dogs should strictly adhere by the rules governing cats and dogs. Cats should be accommodated inside a house, while dogs should be kept away from the house, as far as possible, but exceptions on rare occasions, when the dogs are too small may be considered, on meritorious cases to be taken up during General body meetings, other wise all the dogs should be kept chained out side the gates if possible.

The entire area of operation should be kept in dark as early as possible, late sitting by men with the lights switched on is hindering their duty hence, to be switched off as early as 6pm itself. Exceptions, if any, may be allowed on conditions to be stipulated every once in a year. The rats and mice caught are entirely the property of the responsible cat and under no circumstances will they relax on the said rule.

Some cats belonging to European, US and Canada has strongly objected the winter cold and the man made atmospheric warmness, which is taking a toll on the health conditions of Cats and they have very strongly advised foolish mankind to reverse the effects of global warming or else they will be going on mass strike, enabling rats and mouse to pile up on the garbage and ‘plague will be the result’ warned their president from Chicago.

They are also very much concerned of their infantile mortality rate ‘which has been alarmingly rising in the last few decades’ due to the ignorance of foolish people around the globe’ quoted their spokes cat.

However, the only comforting news for humanity has come from the Cats association, as they have agreed to relax some of the above rules due to the severe recession faced by mankind, and the liquidity crunch as a direct result of the foolish men and their plan less approach, unlike cats who plans the traps for rats meticulously and their patience can be emulated by the ultimate fools called human beings. They have also formed a committee to look urgently in to the causes of recession and inform their counterparts among humans, as a solidarity measure, provided the dogs are kept in check by human beings around the world. During their closing ceremony they also reminded their other senior family members such as lions, tigers, leopards and panthers to join together against the fight against dogs and men.


MEAOW vs BOW WOW



‘cat attacks the dog’



‘how dare you come near’
says the
CAT


guys your place is out
see you bye.. bye…

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