Sunday, May 31, 2009



I can authoritively tell as a past member , that too of the finest quality drinker of alcohol and there was time when I started booze in the morning 2AM and go on for an indefinite period or till I fall down. Food was scarce, as I always feared of losing my kick every time I eat. It all started from my college days, for us as few together [5 of us.]It was a way of announcing to the world about our arrival on the scene the older ones have to move away or regret later, young times when in your teens you have the guts to do any thing and every thing most of the times out of drunken excuse.

I remember my self a slow starter to begin with but as I got on with my plus two [Pre Degree during our days], we get the taste of a full fledged college, with all the rivalries and some out to love eternally towards most of those pretty girls with sign language and eye to eye conversation, silent of course, for most are shy but cant help looking at girls and to prove his macho ness must have a cigarette or, beedi when you are down, and on special occasions when you get free sponsors for a drink or two, used make us quite drunk and there was a feel good factor in the beginning.

That was perhaps the reason for us to have got hooked in to it. Experiments with drugs were quite an exhilarating stuff in the beginning, but as time goes by and when you start the level of drinking daily along with drugs, marijuana, hashish, goli [Hooka] and so many drugs which you can procure from the chemists, all those stuff gives you a good feeling for about half hour to one hour, depending on the cost of the stuff and the refinement the product goes through.

Then comes the time when, from an addict you become a slave, slowly and your dependence on some kind of drugs or alcohol becomes total, you start to spend all you get for these stuff leaving you little left for a proper living and most of the times you are either broke or living on the edge, as some might call it. In our case though all five of us made good in life is a fact but, we had this back stories as well. We were never after girls and hates to wait for someone, while we have witnessed so many of those guys who spend all day putting make up on their faces and waiting for hours for a certain girl to come along and get a look see leave alone talking, we used to rag those guys and threaten them or blackmail them for we know their weakness, and most occasion they would want it to be kept a secret, those are the guys who will have to spend for our freaky life styles. The truth is that those guys will spend heavily on guarding their name, but for us we don’t give a damn, whether we lose face or get caught drunk, which we did get through, and many an occasions in the course of my five year college life.

We used to get them in to play cards games in the room we rented for the purpose of having a place on top of our local tea shop cum hotel , which will provide food any time we order cheaply as we paid Rs.2/- during late seventies to get 3 Paratas with beef fry, or fish curry always hot and best ,due to the very fact that we hardly eat as we need the fund for our other activities , so diversion of funds by making the end use wrongly and perhaps sinfully though, we never made any other criminal activities, but for the sounds and vomiting and at times may find us fast asleep in some corner in the remote woods around the college that we had along with a small mountain , we can climb half way and feel secured that no one can see us sinning. Some how those days we still had some isolated places to indulge in such activities but of late you don’t have a place with out people gazing at you. If you are caught doing those things we did during our days, some one might definitely catch us as the whole country has become very densely populated.

It went on for about a couple of decades and little more in between I got married and was blessed with a girl child, that was the time I started to feel the ping in my heart , for the guilty feeling was too high each morning , when I got up with a bloody hang over.

The guilt of seeing my daughter, growing while I was still in it, but god intervened in the form of my father in law and my paternal uncle, who took me to alcoholic anonymous and somehow kicked the habit with the help of an anti dot which will give you intolerable pain, which will make you hate the stuff next time you smell or see it.

Once I was out of it I started to think well and wanted to make up for all the damage done during my addicted years, when, I lost quite a few of my good friends and my family too must have been suffering due to my indulging in such activities, which can make you have dual character, a good one when sober, and the worst guy on earth while under the influence of the drug or alcohol.

The most important fact is to make up your mind to kick the habit once and for all, then you will find ways of doing it with help of course, as it is a decease and needed treatment, which very few will admit as they might think themselves having the courage and will power, to skip the habit, but the truth is that you can not easily do it unless you are a superman. Change of place and life style also can help you change yourself as well from a hopeless drunkard to a nice person loved by all. The truth and fact is the ones who get in to the trap are usually the most intelligent and capable guys, who waste their life time by getting in to the habit and then get addicted and becomes a slave.

So guys and girls remember it is truly possible if you have the will and treatments which can save your life and your family will also survive or other wise your family life will be doomed and all will perish, oh what a waste of talent and good life.

Fiction/facts/thoughts of ‘solitairebala’ pl. visit Google for more.

No comments: